Note: This article is based on writer Darius Foroux, who offers 4 tips to adopt a positive attitude to life regardless of negative experiences.
Sometimes we take things for granted. Although I have experienced many difficulties in life - like almost everyone else - I never gave up my positive mindset.
Sometimes, we think about life and we feel that it's full of negativity, which is not surprising. Browsing quickly through news websites is enough to make the most positive person depressed. This happens with everyone, but to end up with a negative view of life is nothing but a misjudgment, which only leads to frustration.
The Stoic philosopher Epictetus clarified this in his instructions 2,000 years ago, saying: "When we're frustrated, angry, or unhappy, we must take responsibility for these emotions. They are the result of our misjudgment."
4 Tips to Have and Maintain a Positive Mindset:
The whole stoic philosophy is based on the idea of being objective in our perceptions. When your thoughts become negative for some reason, you make misjudgments, and Epictetus continues: "No one else is responsible for these feelings. When you hold others responsible for your negative feelings, you just become disregarding of others. When you hold your self responsible for these feelings, you start making progress. But when you stop blaming yourself or others, you become wise". So, blaming yourself or others is a "No" if you want to stay positive. Rather, you have to follow these four tips in order to accomplish this:
1. Practice gratitude:
Taking a few minutes a day to write about things you're grateful for helps you change your perspective. The strange thing about this is that when you read about it, you don't believe it's effective. That's what I thought, too, but once I started practicing gratitude, I felt more in control of my life.
At one point I stopped writing about things that made me feel grateful, and didn't actually feel any difference for the first weeks. But after a few months, I noticed that I nagged more than usual, and I felt more frustrated compared to before. When I went back to practicing gratitude, I felt balanced again and constantly calm.
Note that you can be grateful even for things you didn't want. It's even more helpful to be grateful for everything, even the bad things.
2. Don't take others' words and actions personally:
Most of our frustrations come from what others say or do. In other words, we are disappointed because of what they said or the way they have behaved with us.
Well cut it out and lighten up. It is destructive in terms of happiness and psychological well-being to overthink what others have said or done. Therefore, take it easy and know that people often do things that don't make sense, and most of what they do shouldn't be taken personally.
If you want to live happily, you shouldn't take everything personally. Instead, focus on more important things like your health, family, and career.
3. Express your feelings:
It's very helpful to be in control of your thoughts and emotions and try to draw lessons from your experiences. We all deal with problems in life. Like a partner who doesn't listen to you, annoying co-workers , loud neighbors, and so on. No one lives a perfect and quiet life, and this is something that we need to accept. Some of us need a long time to accept this fact because most people have this unrealistic idea of having a perfect life with no stress, anxiety, or consuming responsibilities.
But as you mature, you'll understand that life is a constant challenge, but you shouldn't let it pull you down. Hence, you should let things take their natural course.
You need to let go of your frustration, resentment, anxiety, and insecurity by expressing your feelings in writing a diary, talking to a friend, and even visiting a therapist. The important thing is to let go of these negative feelings and emotions.
4. Focus on self-development:
Life is not always easy. We all go through hard times, but we tend to think of them as the basic quality of life. When we fall short or have a negative experience, we amplify the effects in our mind, and as simple as it is, we consider it a disaster. But did you really think that it's not that complicated and can be seen as an opportunity to improve your life?
Whether you're at your best or going through a tough time, you should know that they are temporary and that both will pass. That is what you need to realize. Then, you'll know that you always have a chance to improve your life, which is the best investment of time and energy.
Highlights:
Don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Focus on what you can do now to improve any aspect of your life, even if it's very simple such as going for a walk, taking a shower until you feel better, maybe writing journals, fixing something in your home, or setting a goal and jotting down some ideas. You can do these things even if you're not feeling well because the goal isn't always to be at your best.
In fact, when I was writing this article, I wasn't feeling my best because I was ill, but once I started writing, I felt better.
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