All the obligations of your personal life- from providing food and paying bills and others- are accompanied by this constant painful feeling that you are not doing enough and that you are not good enough and will never be.
You are worried because you compare yourself to others; you think they are better than you, and all the things you do not have and what you have missed, and you feel guilty because you are not better, thinner, stronger, and smarter than you are now. Still, you are not the only one who suffers from this; we are all busy with our thoughts sometimes, but you must realize that no matter what happens, you will be fine.
We always focus on the bad things that might happen, the unkind opinions of people about us, and so on. In short, we focus only on the negative possibilities, but these negative possibilities are only a small set of a sea of options. So, the chances of them becoming a reality are slim; even if one comes true, their negative impact is rarely as catastrophic as we imagine.
If our fears come true, we'll be fine, so try to imagine all the little things you've been worrying about lately. You've survived every one of these possibilities; life hasn't ended. Even when you've had to deal with some difficulties for a while, you've learned valuable lessons that have strengthened you.
Suppose you're used to telling yourself that you're going to be okay and that you're okay now. In that case, you can gradually let go of your fears the moment you feel them - you can think more clearly, you can finally live a better life, you can start your day with a clear mind and a real smile on your face, and then you can move forward positively.
What do you do when disaster strikes?
“On my 27th birthday, I wrote the suicide note about two minutes before my wife entered my apartment and told me she was pregnant. It was the only reason I didn't end my life then. Suddenly, I felt I had something worth living for and making positive changes. It took a long time. But my wife and I are happy to be married. My daughter is now a 21-year-old university student studying medicine and has two younger brothers. I reread that suicide note every year on the morning of my birthday to remind myself to be grateful for the second chance I got in life.”
These words, written by a young man named Kevin, remind us that sometimes we must hit rock bottom first before we can get back up and stronger.
Circumstances and people sometimes lead to frustration and break your psyche to the lowest levels. However, if you focus on the positive things, keep your heart open for love, and keep moving forward, as you can come back stronger and happier than ever. Here are three clear clues that you'll be fine if you're not now:
1. Everything changes; nothing is certain, but you are free:
Everything in life is temporary, and nothing lasts. Every moment can be a new beginning and a new end. There is a unique opportunity every second of life; every time it rains, the rain will stop after that, and everything that rises will fall, and after dark every day, the sun will rise in the morning.
People worldwide are constantly telling their heartbreaking stories of how their lives became about dealing with a particular event from the past. Then they miss out on every opportunity they have in the present because they are obsessed with something that has happened and is over and cannot be changed. The key is to realize that you don't have to be one of those people.
Your past shapes who you are, but you must not be a prisoner of it; your past restricts you when you hold on to what no longer exists, so remember: If you are brave enough to give it up, life will reward you with a new opportunity, and it may be difficult, but you can do it, and you must.
You must let go, accept the uncertainty about your next destination, and train yourself to love and appreciate this freedom because only when you are unsure what will happen. You do not have a specific destination; force yourself to give your best; you may not know where to go, but you know that as long as you do your best, you will progress.
2. How you respond to circumstances is up to you:
We often crave a small, specific set of life experiences because we only want the good times, the relaxing situations, and the experiences that make us happy. Still, the reality we face every day is entirely different. Life forces us to live a wide range of very different backgrounds that drive in us various feelings of anger, love, heartbreak, joy, frustration, excitement, loneliness, and confusion, each of which is part of our reality and being human.
The question is: How do we respond to them? You can get angry because you don't get everything you want and have to deal with the pain, or you can try to resist and deny those feelings of sadness, frustration, and confusion. But beware that all these choices will eventually lead you into a deep spiral of despair.
The best option is to accept the whole reality and the wide range of life experiences you face, both good and bad. This includes all the emotions, fluctuations, and happy and painful moments; life is not limited to comfort and joy; it is complex and wonderful because of that.
Accepting life fully in this way means being open to unimaginable possibilities, experiencing unexpected changes, empathizing with yourself when times are tough, giving yourself some extra love and kindness no matter what happens, and being grateful for the opportunity to experience all of it.
This means not always expecting to be the perfect person living the ideal life but accepting reality, accepting yourself as you are, and then making the best use of it.
3. There is always one positive step you can take right away:
Don't try to make massive changes all at once because when you seek significant, quick results, you will cause pain and frustration for yourself. Still, when you choose instead to treat each moment as an opportunity to make a small, positive investment, the results will follow naturally.
Finding many small things you can fix is easy when something is completely broken. Positive efforts can make a big difference when nothing seems to go well. When times of adversity come to you, great opportunities appear. When problems surround you wherever you look, you also have a great underlying value waiting for you to invest. Still, when everything goes well, it is easy to be dragged into a routine of inactivity, and it is easy to forget how smart you are and what you can do, so resolve to work and take a small step each time.
You will get there by taking small steps and making regular small fixes and changes daily. If you want to start now, challenge yourself to do so; choose a specific area of your life that you want to improve, then:
- Write down specific details about your current circumstances: What's bothering you? What's the problem? What do you want to change?
- Write your answer to this question: What are the daily habits that contributed to your current circumstances? Be honest with yourself. What do you do that contributes to the continuation of your situation?
- Write down specific details to illustrate how you want your circumstances to become: What makes you happy? What is the ideal situation for you?
- Write your answer to this question: What daily habits will bring about the changes you seek? Think about it, and what are the small daily steps that will help you progress?
The bottom line is that what happens in your life should result from cumulative action. Every moment is an opportunity to move from where you are now to where you want to be.
You can change your future every second. You just have to decide to act now. The biggest mistake you can make is to simply do nothing because you can only do so little right now, and again, taking so many small steps in the right direction achieves far greater results than a significant attempt to get you to stumble, fall, and never get up again.
The path to what you want in life requires a ritual of a thousand small steps separated by short intervals, so find out where you want to go, take the first step, and keep moving. Diligence and perseverance will get you to what you want.
In conclusion:
We understand the importance of loving and caring for one's parents, children, or other important people, and we do our best to do so daily. Still, we neglect to give ourselves the same level of love and attention, as evidenced by the answers to the following questions:
- Do you criticize your physical appearance?
- Are you telling yourself you're not good enough?
- Do you hurt yourself when you compare yourself to others?
- Are you forced to do things you don't want to do?
- Do you overlook your own needs to meet the needs of others?
- Are you reprimanding yourself for making a mistake?
For most of us, we feel less deeply than we think we should be, and that's not something we intentionally do to hurt ourselves, yet it happens over and over again, but we can choose to act differently.
Choose today to start practicing more self-love, self-care, and self-acceptance. Think about yourself, your body, your feelings, and your situation. Tell yourself you are fine, good enough, and deserve happiness; it will change your attitude and life, and try to accept everything in you exactly as you are now without the longing to change yourself.
It is also important to note that accepting yourself as you are is not about inaction and not trying to develop yourself; it is about realizing that you cannot hate yourself and change yourself for the better. At the same time, positive growth must be based on love and acceptance. Only people who love themselves can take positive actions to help them progress.
Ultimately, you will change no matter what happens; nothing lasts, and you cannot avoid change over time, whether based on love and acceptance or self-loathing and rejection.
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