We live our lives with a firm desire to give everything we have to achieve lofty goals, but we do not know when to withdraw or when it is enough.
Most people are highly idealistic and consider it a good thing until it affects them negatively. Doing so is worrisome because, according to independent studies from the University of British Columbia and the University of Tehran, the pursuit of idealism is linked to depression, anxiety, and a plethora of mental health problems.
To overcome idealism, you must learn to recognize when it is holding you back. This task is very challenging because the tendency towards idealism motivates us to act diligently and enthusiastically. You should shift your mindset from idealism to optimism, as optimists do their best to succeed but are more flexible and adaptable in pursuing their goals.
Changing your mindset from idealism to optimism will make you happier and more productive; therefore, you need to recognize the signs of idealism that are holding you back.
The defining characteristics of perfection that are beyond your control
Here are the hallmarks of idealism that are beyond your control:
1. You recognize that idealism is a problem when you believe it is the cause of success
You need to push yourself hard to be successful, and when your idealism gets out of hand, it's easy to use hard work as a justification for your unnecessary pain and suffering. Perfectionism causes unnecessary struggles and strife, but when you control your idealism, you can work less and get more done.
2. You defend yourself when you receive feedback
Idealistic people care deeply about what others think of them, and this makes it difficult for them to receive feedback; even helpful and well-presented ones seem challenging for them to accept. You are likely to defend yourself before you even realize that you are receiving feedback, a natural reaction that occurs without thinking.
Considering you are an idealistic person, you have a strong desire to succeed, so do not worry about feedback (even if it is annoying) because it will eventually help you improve your work. Deal with feedback calmly; it will help you approach idealism.
3. You criticize others
Although idealistic people can't receive criticism, they are highly critical of others. Idealistic people do not compare themselves to others. Underestimating someone, especially if they pose a threat, is good. However, this is not always the case, as idealistic people criticize others because they compare them to the same unattainable standards with which they compare themselves.
4. You constantly procrastinate
Idealism and the fear of failure are inseparable. This combination leads to procrastination because even ordinary tasks are scary when they must be completed to the fullest. Most writers spend many hours brainstorming about characters and plot and write many pages that they know will not be included in their books. They do so because they know that ideas need time to develop and improve.
We tend to stop thinking when it's time to start something because we know that our ideas aren't perfect and that what we produce may not be good. However, how can you produce something great if you don’t start and give your ideas some time to develop? Author Jodi Picoult summed up the importance of avoiding perfection altogether, saying, “You can edit a bad page, but you can't edit a blank page.”
4. You feel guilt and remorse
Idealistic people constantly feel guilty about the thoughts in their minds because they always feel like they are lacking. This guilt leads to increased stress and can easily turn into depression and anxiety. Guilt is the result of your self-talk, and the more negative you think, the more it affects you. However, most of our negative thoughts are just thoughts, not facts.
When you believe what your pessimistic inner voice tells you, it is time to stop and write it down. You must immediately stop what you are doing and write down everything you think of. Once you take some time to stop the negative momentum of your ideas, you will be more rational and clear in evaluating their validity.
5. You take mistakes personally
Idealistic people take their work so seriously that they tend to overestimate the impact of their mistakes. Simple events can cause them to feel very disappointed. This problem is critical because it makes you less resilient, making the ability to overcome failure essential to success. Idealistic people must learn that failure does not mean they are not good enough.
6. You enjoy the failures of others
This well-known secret about idealistic people isn't as bad as it sounds, but sad people always strive to make others unhappy as well. Idealistic people can't feel satisfied unless they're sure that others are experiencing the same frustrations as they are, but these feelings are short-lived and make them feel bad for being competitors.
7. You fear taking risks
Fear of failure is accompanied by fear of risk, where the hard work of idealistic people, research, and attention to detail result in innovative ideas. Unfortunately, their thoughts often do not receive attention because of their fear of taking risks.
The only way to get used to the risk is to take it. Starting to do exactly that is never easy, but by actively pursuing the things that make us uncomfortable, we build confidence and realize that it is not as bad as we imagine.
8. You fear being rejected
Idealistic people need the approval of others to feel successful. This mindset leads them to fear rejection. Idealistic people fear some things, such as asking for a promotion or pursuing their passion.
Fear of rejection is a bad thing and affects creativity and the person's progress. When you find yourself overly interested in what others think of you, remember what novelist Theodor Seuss said about credibility: “Be yourself and say what you feel, because those who mind don't care, and those who care don't mind.”
Conclusion
To overcome idealism, you must be the best version of yourself, which means pursuing the things you love, trusting that hard work will pay off, learning from your mistakes, and gaining self-satisfaction.
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