Note: This article is from the founder of Riskology, Tyler Tervooren, which tells us how to build a steady routine.
If you're struggling with a routine, the solution may be simple, channeling your impulses toward the right causes. Here's how to do it:
Intrinsic Motives and Extrinsic Motives:
If you talk to someone who works in drug rehabilitation, you'll hear the same wisdom repeatedly: "Success depends on your motivation." Everyone who overcomes drug addiction has the motivation, but those who succeed in the long run have the motivation directed by the right reasons.
What are the right reasons?
Research shows that rehab success continues when patients are motivated to improve themselves. Some people may go to rehab. This is because they fear losing their jobs, homes, or families. These patients may recover but rarely last. On the other hand, others go to rehabilitation because they are afraid of losing themselves, and these people change their lives forever.
This example illustrates the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. When you have an extrinsic motivation to change, the things that drive this change are outside of you and, therefore out of your control. For a rehab addict, that trigger could be losing a relationship, a job, or something else.
The motivation might be similar when building a routine to save time or improve yourself. Perhaps your partner is insisting on you to be healthier, so you're trying to build a fitness routine, or maybe your boss has mentioned that you're not as productive as you should be. Therefore, you try to organize yourself at work.
The data suggests that if these are your motives, your efforts are likely to fail. You will start with it, but when the going gets tough, you will give up, and it will always get harder before it gets easier.
External factors change, and you have no control over them. Trying to keep up with these factors proves futile over time. However, when you are motivated from within, you are driven by the desire to improve yourself.
You are only responsible for yourself, which means you control the variables determining whether you will succeed or fail. When all factors come together in your own good, you are likely to make a lasting change.
Inner motivations create a sustainable routine:
What is more interesting is that the external motives that drive you are often more satisfying when you ignore them and focus on finding your inner motivations and acting on them instead.
For example, suppose your manager tells you that you don't contribute enough to brainstorming sessions with your team, and you are too quiet, and that prevents you from getting a promotion.
If pleasing your boss and getting a promotion are your primary drivers for improvement, you'll have a hard time. You will accept their feedback and try to speak in team meetings, but you will feel that it is not natural and that you do not express yourself well.
This is the problem with extrinsic motives. You're letting someone else figure out what's right for you and take action to fix it, which isn't sustainable. However, what if you look deeper into that feedback? Perhaps you have a genuine desire to be an influencer, and the feedback you received from your manager shows you that you are not engaging with your team as well as you should.
Focusing on intrinsic motivation will lead you to different solutions to the same problem, and you will probably devote more time to having one-on-one conversations with your teammates or build a routine of communicating with colleagues via email or chat to discuss ideas as they arise.
This routine will be sustainable because you build it as a result of your desire to please yourself and not as a result of someone else's desires.
Strategies for Inspiring Your Inner Motivation:
We all have external motivations to some degree. If you have a hard time building systems and routines that become part of your life and produce the lasting changes you hope for, the trick is to look for the internal motivations that will provide you with those results.
Here are some strategies you can try that have worked for millions who enjoy the proven benefits of routine:
1. Focus on the change you feel rather than the change you see:
Exercise and health are the best examples of this. Everyone wants to look great, but the only reason to look great is that other people like what they see in you, and if you want to improve your appearance, you have to dig a little deeper into the reasons.
Instead of making your appearance the main motivator, focus on getting stronger and leaner, as well as building more endurance. These are the things you actually control. As these metrics improve, so will your appearance.
2. Do only what you enjoy:
The idea that you can do something you hate over and over until you like it is just a myth in most cases. It may work at first, but it will be painful. The resentment that slowly builds up will eventually lead to failure, and you will lose your progress. Instead, just focus on doing what you enjoy, which will also lead to the results you want. This is the essence of being true to yourself.
Consider the above example of a quiet employee who has to become more influential to advance in their company. Many strategies for meeting desired needs are worth trying, but long-term success comes when that employee finds a few strategies that work perfectly for them.
3. When you start a routine, try not to give up for at least 30 days:
When I started running, I didn't like it very much. I was overweight, and I didn't handle it very well, but I stuck with it for a few months. Running became one of my favorite activities after running tens of thousands of miles.
Keep going on something important to you just because you're not good at it, and do not convince yourself that you do not love it until you become skilled in it and still do not love it then. It is difficult to love something that you are not good at. It will be fun once you know what you're doing. If you commit to trying something new for at least 30 days, your skill will improve. You might learn to love the experience as you get better.
4. Focus on continuity, not results:
You have more control over how often you do something than the results you get from doing it. Results come from persistence in action, not the other way around.
In conclusion:
These are the key factors for building a routine that becomes a natural part of your life, rather than a routine that you struggle to implement repeatedly. When you let your inner motivates guide you, the results you get will not only be better, but they will even be more satisfying to you.
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