Stories and examples of emotional intelligence skills:
First: emotional intelligence in love
When it comes to a love relationship, we all have a list of personal wishes and qualities that we want in a lover. However, emotional intelligence skills are a major key to success and continuity in this relationship. Both partners must actively work on their emotional intelligence (EQ), and work on acquiring those skills in order to get the greatest chance of continuation of the relationship.
It is common for us in a love relationship to have a "checklist" of what we are looking for in a significant other. Emotional intelligence is often missing from this list, even though emotional intelligence skills should be at the top of that list.
It's great to have an intelligent lover with a high emotional intelligence. Dating someone with a high IQ is very special. A research study - conducted in 2001 entitled "Emotional Intelligence and Interpersonal Relationships" led by Dr. Nicola Schott and her research team - came to some interesting conclusions. The study found higher marital satisfaction in couples who described each other as emotionally intelligent. This study clearly indicated that emotional intelligence skills are critical in relationships.
There are two parts to emotional intelligence, which are being aware of your own feelings (noticing what they are and knowing how to manage them) and being aware of others' feelings (sympathetics). An emotionally intelligent person can be said to have a high emotional quotient (EQ).
If you want a happy and long-term relationship, there is no doubt that finding a partner with high emotional intelligence will help you achieve your relationship goals. There is no perfect relationship. But when you and your partner have a high IQ, you can manage the ups and downs together. Also you can resolve conflicts together and communicate better.
Second: emotional intelligence in relationships
Success in our contemporary world is dependent on the extent to which one manages his relationships properly. The management of interpersonal relationships can be enhanced through emotional intelligence. Evidence suggests that people with higher levels of emotional intelligence lead more successful careers and nurture better relationships than those with lower emotional intelligence. How not if the definition of emotional intelligence is the ability to understand our own feelings and the feelings of others, and the ability to regulate and manage these feelings. Through this definition we can realize the importance of emotional intelligence skills in building and strengthening relationships with others.
Self-awareness is one of the most important emotional intelligence skills that helps us control our feelings and increase our ability to adapt. In relationships, there are many questions we ask ourselves. For example: Have I disciplined my child correctly? Can I accept that my partner is professional and spends a lot of time at work? Is it fair that my partner spends more time on the golf course than at home? The process of self-awareness is simple.
Limited awareness leads to distraction, arguments, and a weak relationship. So a clear understanding and the ability to discuss things can lead to better relationships. One suggestion to increase self-awareness would be to discuss plans at the beginning of each week. Self meditation is also a useful tool for increasing self-awareness. In essence, increased self-awareness leads to a better balance between family, work and social life.
The concept of self regulation is also related to emotional intelligence. Which is about understanding how your body reacts to emotions. Emotions can be categorized as positive or negative. Positive emotions provide people with affirmations that lead to boosted orientation and focus. People with positive emotions will generally be happier and feel mentally balanced.
Negative emotions fuel the body with feelings of hopelessness, stress, anxiety, and even depression. These issues cause people to lose control. So people should try to regulate their feelings and recognize their partners' feelings. Regulating your feelings is important because relationships fluctuate between happiness and sadness.
Empathy is one of the most important elements of emotional intelligence that one should have. It is essential when we support one another. Lack of empathy for your loved one can be harmful and must be addressed. Empathy is an understanding of needs, desires and appreciation.
To foster empathy it would be useful to identify the needs of the partners and examine the ways in which they are met. We must ask whether we understand the needs of our loved ones. That is, are we able to think about what they are thinking or doing? We must not try to be "me" centered. In fact, we should speak of “we”. Having discussions about how to support one another reinforces empathetic needs and desires.
Third: Emotional intelligence in upbringing
Always when parents or educators think about raising children, the first thing that comes to their mind is the subject of education and study. It is very important not to underestimate the value of the emotional well-being of the child. With the expansion of the use of emotional intelligence skills, these skills have become an essential part of the curricula in various educational systems around the world. But the most important question that arises is:
How can parents and educators use emotional intelligence in raising children? How can those skills be enhanced?
First of all, parents, teachers, and adults in general who work with children should give good examples of effective and gentle communication, acceptance and understanding towards all people. That is by finding practical strategies to deal with how we and others feel. In doing so, we will be able to regulate our emotions rather than allowing them to regulate us.
For example, when I want to teach my child to feel more positive emotions, I have to teach him how to change his thoughts. This is what changes his condition. Teach your child when he's anxious to look at something still and take slow, relaxing deep breaths to bring back the positive feeling.
Children with learning differences often feel different in some way and may become detached. So it is more important to check in with them and support them in learning how to manage their emotions effectively. That is by teaching them to use accurate vocabulary to describe their feelings, while also supporting your children in developing accurate vocabulary. For example, instead of saying you're "happy" with a situation, you can use words like "high" or "over the moon". Not only does this precision of expression give the conversation a glow of heightened emotion, It also increases the child’s vocabulary. Studies and research indicate that children who have skills in emotional intelligence are more able to express their emotions, and more able to make a logical match to their problems. Also they are more efficient in the educational process than others who do not have these skills.
Fourth: Emotional intelligence in education
Research has revealed that emotional intelligence is just as important as cognitive intelligence. This is because emotionally intelligent students are better equipped to deal with negative emotions that may disrupt the learning process. For example, students who have a high rate of emotional intelligence skills can quickly overcome exam stress and continue to answer questions. Also they can overcome boredom and maintain focus during the learning process.
It is not enough for the student to be intelligent and diligent. To have an extra advantage for success, students must have the skill to understand their feelings in order to be able to manage them. Emotional intelligence is very useful for subjects such as English, history, drama, and creative arts. You need to understand human emotions. Regarding the university level, college students who have high emotional intelligence skills have a range of traits. Which are as follows:
- They are likely to have lower levels of anxiety and depression.
- They are more likely to be socially active and engaged.
- They are more likely to be in good shape and feel healthy.
- As with high school, you will also have a better chance of building bonds with your professors and peers.
Fifth: emotional intelligence at work
Like all previous aspects, emotional intelligence skills are just as important at work as in other sectors of life. There are no surprises here. Emotional intelligence continues to influence your success once you enter the workforce. This applies especially for jobs that involve emotional encounters “like working with clients, leading a team, or dealing with conflicts.”
This applies not only to lower-level jobs. Even senior business leaders need to use emotional intelligence skills to remain business leaders. Using emotional intelligence is an essential team management skill, especially when times are tough. According to several studies, people with high emotional intelligence are characterized by:
- Better performance in their jobs.
- Enjoy stronger personal relationships.
- Enjoy better overall health and well-being.
- Having the personal motivation that drives them to achieve what they want from the work they do.
In conclusion:
Emotional intelligence is not something you turn on overnight. Rather, it is a sophisticated skill that takes time and conscious effort to develop over the years. By thinking about it now, you are giving yourself a great start on the journey to get a high level of emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence has become an important key feature that successful and distinguished people are looking for. Based on this importance, each individual must work on acquiring these skills and applying them on the ground to achieve success in various aspects of life.
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