Note: This article is based on the work of the writer Angel Chernoff, in which she tells us about her personal experience in overcoming her feelings of distress and stumbling in completing her tasks; as she summarized her experience in ten important points that enabled her to overcome this condition.
I know I've done this many times. In the past, I felt bad and didn't want to admit it. In the end, I knew I needed to find a new roadmap. I Felt so depressed and helpless because of the same old issues and details, so I needed to free myself.
Note: This article is taken from the author, "Angel Chernoff", in which she talks about her personal experience in overcoming her feeling of distress and stumbling over the completion of her tasks. She summarized her experience in ten important points that enabled her to overcome this situation.
The first thing I learned as I struggled to find my way
Fear is the prison you live in, and faith is the key that sets you free. The second thing I learned is that freedom from powerlessness is not a one-size-fits-all procedure. Rather, it is a long process that begins with a call to adventure, and this call varies from one person to another.
Below are ten strategies I have applied successfully over the years to help clients and myself work through mental and physical issues.
Doing so seemed impossible
1. Move to an inspiring environment
One of the simplest ways to get rid of obstacles is to change your environment, and the great thing is that this transition doesn't have to be a major shift. You can go for a walk to a nearby park, you can go out of the office for a cup of coffee, or if you are at home, you can move to another room.
When a task is too difficult for me, I do two of my favorite things to do:
- I Go to a nearby park and walk among the trees for 45 minutes.
- I Meditate for 20 minutes in the back garden of the city library, then read a chapter or two from a great book.
We live in an amazing world, and we all enjoy inspiring environments around us, especially in developed countries. There are many available sources from which we can draw inspiration and strength, whether it is urban spaces, gardens, libraries, museums, or even our backyards.
2. Back to what's important
One of the models I use to help clients and customers is the idea of core values, beliefs and goals. Here is a quick overview of it:
- Core values are our big ideals, such as happiness, generosity, or success.
- Beliefs are the hundreds and thousands of axioms we believe in, such as "The sun will rise tomorrow morning," or "People should treat others as they wish to be treated."
- Goals are the results we seek in life.
When we feel powerless, it can be helpful to return to these three things: core values, beliefs, and goals because they form an important fabric for us as individuals. It serves as a reminder of who we are, how we got to where we are now, and what will lead us into the future, no matter what may come our way.
3. Inspiration
Inspiration may be an idea, intuition, or anything else. Even the smallest idea that seems trivial can turn into a creative masterpiece if we give it free rein. An article, comment, quote, or story from a friend may inspire you. Just a small thought may free you from self-limiting thought patterns.
4. Faith and patience
There is no place for chance in our lives. When we feel helpless, we think that the entire universe stands in our way, the people around us, the world, and circumstances. You must have belief, faith, trust, and hope that the universe is not a bad or good place.
Rather, it is a mirror that reflects what is inside you, as it rewards people who are positivite and patient. If you firmly believe that positive things can happen, they will happen gradually, and you will be free from your negative thoughts and move forward.
Focus on the things you can control, and don't worry about what is beyond your control, just be patient, and know that patience does not mean waiting, but rather having a positive attitude with effort and perseverance.
5. Embrace natural paths
One of the core things we help our clients with is building systems. Most people now think of systems as something mechanical or man-made, something cold, soulless, and machine-like, but this could not be further from the truth. Every system is a means of solving problems and getting rid of obstructions.
A system is a natural course of thought that someone has created in their mind. Whether it is a system for making a cup of tea, a system for overcoming fear, or a system for managing a team of people, a system is a way of thinking that someone created that is now being used by others to help them accomplish tasks or overcome certain challenges.
So, when you feel helpless, don't start from scratch. Rather, ask the people around you about the systems through which they succeeded in overcoming the difficulties they faced, read wisdom books and articles, and use the same methods and paths that others used to liberate and move forward.
6. Ask for help
One of the greatest secrets of very happy and successful people is that they don't get to this point themselves. They have a supportive group of friends, family, mentors, and others who help them succeed. Regardless of all the details, they always ask for help when they need it, and they enjoy helping other people who also want to succeed.
When you ask someone for help, you are not bothering them, or being a nuisance to them. Rather, it gives them the opportunity to learn as well because we - we humans - learn as students or teachers. So, when you feel helpless, do not hesitate to ask for help, and do not be afraid to communicate and help another person who feels helpless more than you.
7. Get rid of worry and focus on something else
One of the amazing things about productivity and efficiency that I discovered early on in my personal journey is the power of creative procrastination. This is also known as “focusing on something else.”
When you have a daunting task ahead of you, like having a difficult conversation with someone, you will find yourself wanting to procrastinate, and this is completely normal and understandable. In most cases, you should procrastinate and give yourself enough time to organize your thoughts, but do it smartly.
That is, instead of just sitting confused and evading that person, go and do something else that activates your mind, and allows you to think more freely, like writing, meditating, drawing, playing the guitar, or doing sports.
You have to let your mind and body connect, work, and prepare for the daunting task ahead of you. By focusing your attention on the right things, your mind will do just that, and when you come back later, you will find yourself better able to handle the daunting task with less stress and anxiety.
8. Respect your inclinations
We are all beings with unlimited potential, but we are certainly not designed to do everything. We all have things that we are attracted to, talents that are easy for us, and skills that we have worked hard to master. You need to respect your inclinations.
Some people give their best in solitude, while others perform best surrounded by others, some people are good at taking things apart and then putting them back together, while others are good at creating pieces of art from scratch.
When you feel powerless, you may be in the wrong environment, working under the wrong conditions, or you are in the wrong state of mind. To free yourself, just think, re-evaluate, and then try something a little different. Make a small shift in your approach or routine and see how it goes for a month, then reassess again.
9. Take action
“I am trying to free your mind, Neo, but I can only show you the door, you are the one who has to walk through it.” - Morpheus, a fictional character in the "The Matrix" series.
Sometimes, all we need to break free is take the next step in our journey. Most of the barriers in front of us are psychological, not physical. There are no physical walls, gates, or barriers to keep us from moving forward.
When this is the truth in your life, all you have to do is to metaphorically take the "next step." You have to move in the right direction again, one small step after another, and all you need is a little momentum to move forward.
10. Start again in the morning
“Success is being able to fall once and get up twice.” - Oliver Goldsmith, English novelist and playwright.
If you feel tired and exhausted today, remember tomorrow morning is a new beginning. There is no shame in slowing down, re-sharpening, sleeping, and starting again in the morning because tomorrow is a new opportunity to try again and learn something new.
This is not failure, this is not giving up, but this is the learning process. That is, be discerning, realize that sometimes it's best to rest, and try again when you're fresh.
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