Note: This article is taken from the blog of Caroline Stokes, who shares her experience in giving feedback.
This tactic conceals good intentions because managers are frequently reluctant to speak negatively to their staff members. This method was invented to pass negative notes between two positive notes.
Employees are aware of this, though. Therefore, to establish trust with your team, you must be direct in what you want to say. Being truthful is the goal since it promotes better relationships and productivity at work. Feedback needs to be responded to by both parties to be helpful.
Before giving your staff any feedback, positive or negative, you should let them know that you value them as unique people. That is because trust is developed gradually through routine daily interactions. So, you should take the time to get to know your employees personally and ask questions about their lives. Since you are their leader, these discussions will be more than just small talk, and they will not distract you from your work; in fact, they are an integral part of it. Your employees will not accept your criticism if they don't sense your genuine concern for them.
How to gain integrity when you give feedback?
How do you gain integrity when you give feedback? The secret to this is to provide feedback when your team sees you receiving feedback yourself as well. The best leaders in the world work hard to remove hierarchical boundaries that prevent lower team members from speaking up when they have a problem at the top of the pyramid.
It also creates a sense of shared responsibility for the success of all aspects of the company. Whatever a person's position, they must be able to speak up when there is a problem because true leaders put their ego aside and listen to constructive criticism regardless of its source.
It is challenging to create this culture because not all leaders are dedicated to honesty in receiving and giving. Only real leaders aspire to be in charge of outstanding groups and companies.
When you are the leader, it is rare to find lower-level employees speaking frankly about what is on their minds. A strange transformation occurs when you become a manager. There is something that scares us and prevents us from challenging authority to the point that we will do almost anything to convince ourselves that we do not need to speak up when we encounter a problem, and phrases like, “I guess it is not that bad.
” Or “Maybe I should find a way to deal with the problem,” but real growth only comes when people are free to speak their minds and confront problems.
I've previously encountered an annoying situation like this when employees resigned unexpectedly, and I remember two former employees in particular; let us call them Ben and Rebecca.
Rebecca was unhappy with her duties in the company, and whenever someone asked about goals she had to achieve, Rebecca would say she wasn't comfortable doing so, and I would ask myself, "What does she mean by that? That is part of her job!" However, Rebecca did not feel she could talk freely about her struggle to do the part of her job that was uncomfortable for her. I wished she felt safe enough to express herself freely with me to find the right solution.
I wish I had created a more trusted environment where everyone felt free to face their fears. Maybe I could help Rebecca work on areas that interest her and serve her talents.
Likewise, I was dying to talk to Ben and tell him he wasn't putting in enough effort at work, and I wanted to know why, so I asked him, "What's going on? You're falling behind in your work, and you're not putting your full focus into it." I wanted to help him. It worked, but Ben didn't feel like he could tell me what was going on with him because I was his manager.
However, all that was on my mind was how to establish a trustworthy working relationship. As for Ben, all he was thinking about was talking about his mistakes and difficulties; it was like talking about himself. It was a dead end, but when he left, I felt remorse for all the conversations I never had with him.
How can you encourage your employees to be honest with you as a leader? You should constantly ask for feedback about yourself and then praise team members who give it to you. That is, frankly, admitting that you are facing difficulties and need someone to direct you towards the right path. If employees don't give you feedback when you ask for it, you should wait a while and then ask again.
That is because they will eventually say something to end the meeting no matter what it takes, and when they do, show your gratitude to them, thus showing that you will not punish them just for telling the truth. However, this does not mean that you should accept all criticism. It is essential to know the intention of the person who gave it to you. If their intention is good, thank them publicly, then tell them about your position in private.
Respecting the opinions of others by nodding along with everything they say is a perfect way to show appreciation for their feedback, whether or not it results in changes. Don't silence someone who speaks truthfully by telling them how wrong they are or how their suggestion wouldn't work. Rather, thank them again so that others feel free to express their opinion.
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