The Art of Being Selfless in Relationships

The Power of Being #2 in Relationships:

In his book "Shortcut for a Better Life", the writer Ziad Rayess mentions: My friend told me about a discussion he had with his father. He said, “Dad, how have you had a relationship with your partner for all this time (more than 25 years) with no problems? What’s your secret?” His father said, “Son, it’s because I chose and accepted to be #2 in the relationship.”

Of course, being #2 in any business or humanitarian partnership requires many qualities:

1. They must always be selfless and prioritize their partner’s prominence.
2. They must accept their partner’s opinion if they disagree on anything, regardless of whether they think the partner is right or not.
3. They must accept the result that their partner sees fit, even if they see it differently, and they must always be forgiving with their partner.
4. They must be sensible and always put the partnership above any temporary personal interest.

I think that this principle is applicable to communal work as well, when a person accepts and gives in to the opinions of others in a group decision and works as hard as they can to make it successful, instead of letting their ego decide.
From another perspective, marriage (the marital partnership) is not very different, although I don’t see it as always being the case. It’s not limited to one party; rather, both parties must act this way and take turns being #2 from time to time. This way, the marriage is sustained on a basis of giving priority to the partnership and its continuation in the family home.

Conclusion:

Being the second in a relationship necessitates selflessness, humility, and a readiness to prioritize the needs of the partnership over personal interests. It is not limited to romantic relationships but can also be applied to communal work and business partnerships. By prioritizing the partnership, tolerating different viewpoints, and showing forgiveness, we can create successful and long-lasting relationships. In order to maintain a marriage on the basis of respect and cooperation between the parties, both must alternate being number two. Choosing to be number two may seem counterintuitive, but it can ultimately result in stronger and more fulfilling relationships.