Twenty Questions that Boost Your Positive Thinking

I feel nostalgic for who I once was, for the days when I had something to be proud of, I miss those days when I was at peace with myself and happy with who I am, I miss those days when I was spontaneous

Note: This article is based on the work of Marc Chernoff, who presents 20 questions that promote a positive thinking style.

And free and had many goals when I used to look in the mirror and don't catch my flaws when I didn't allow other people's negative words to influence me when I was like this, I was able to influence others and make them positive like me; but now I don't like myself, and I miss my former personality.

This was the introduction to a long and heartfelt letter I received in my email from a girl named Lori, who is a follower of my blog; She continues in her message and mentions many questions that haunt her, and that she constantly asks herself, I know entirely that these questions come to her mind unintentionally.

Often the questions we ask ourselves cause our negative thinking, not the answers to those questions. But like Laurie, if you ask yourself negative questions, you will get negative answers; There are no positive answers to questions like:

• Why does this happen to me and not others?
• Why didn't I do this when this happened to me?
• What if I'm not good enough?

and other negative questions, which can never have positive answers; So think seriously, you wouldn't allow anyone to ask you the kind of frustrating questions you sometimes ask yourself; Therefore, stop asking these questions and replace them with positive ones, stimulating your mind to think positively.

Twenty of those questions

1. What are the things in your life would you be grateful for and feel optimistic about right now, if you wanted to think positively?

The most powerful way to get rid of anxiety and negativity is to be able to choose one idea over another. People who refuse to see the positive in what they have may fail to find happiness.

So when you feel that everything in your life justifies you to adopt a negative thinking pattern, choose to think positively.

2. What problem are you grateful you don't have in your life?

That's a great idea. In fact, you should feel happy, not because life is easy, or perfect, or exactly as you expected it to be, but because you choose to be happy and grateful for the many good things you have, and the negative things that haven't happened to you.

3. What are you holding on while you have to let go?

Clinging often makes us weak, while letting go makes us stronger. Ask yourself: Does what was really bothering you 6 months ago, or a year ago, really matter to you right now? The answer will likely be no; if you're still thinking about it, it's not in your interest.

4. What is the thing or person you should forgive?

The purpose of forgiveness is not always to correct relationships or situations, some situations or relationships should not have arisen in the first place, but forgive anyway, let things go as they are supposed to, move on, and set yourself free; Because when you hold a grudge against a person or a situation, you are unintentionally attached to it by a very strong emotional bond, and forgiveness is the only solution to liberation from this bond.

5. What is the right thing to do?

Just because you can do something doesn't necessarily mean you should do it, and just because something is easy doesn't mean it's worth your time. So do what needs to be done, not what is easy, this is the way to live life without feeling too stressed.

6. What is a nice thing you could do for someone else right now?

Do good as much as you can, to as many people as you can, and as often as you can; Doing good, no matter how simple, is not lost, and the reward is always of the same kind as the act. So be kind to others.

7. What compliments have you received recently from others?

The butterfly does not see the color of its wings; But man sees it, the same applies to our positive qualities, we are busy working daily because of the burdens of life; So we don't notice how great we are, but others around us see how wonderful we are, and when someone compliments you or praises you, you should know that they see something extraordinary in you and you should remember it.

8. What do you know is great about you?

Although it is wonderful to hear others praise you, it is not the matter that determines your self-worth, and if someone does not give you praise, give praise to yourself, you are good enough, and also smart, and you have enough strength; You don't need constant support from others, you are wonderful the way you are; So notice your strengths, focus on them, and be proud of what you have.

9. What would you do differently if you knew that others would not judge you?

To be honest, you can't please everyone, and you shouldn't even try to, and don't care what the haters say about you, trust what you know is right, live your life, be happy with who you are, and don't mind the negative judgments of others, practice listening to praise and constructive criticism, and ignore criticism vitriol and negativity, it is not easy; But the results are worth the effort.

10. What activities enhance your authentic personality?

In other words, what activities motivate you to develop yourself according to your authentic personality? Remember that you will not be able to develop yourself unless you are ready for change. Still, as you develop yourself, you will realize that you do not change essential qualities in your personality. It's just that you reinforce it.

11. What excites you about life?

If you genuinely want to be passionate, what are you passionate about? Find those things that excite you, focus on them, and when you believe in what you're doing, you get excellent results for your effort and remember that success is with people who feel passionate about what they do.

12. What excuses should you stop making?

Former US President George Washington said: “It is better not to make an excuse than to make a lame excuse”; People who are good at making excuses are not good at anything else, and no matter what obstacles stand between you and what you want to achieve, what really stops you from achieving your goals are the excuses you make to justify not doing something.

13. If you learn from your mistakes, why are you still afraid of making mistakes?

If you want to learn the right way to do something, you have to make many mistakes and accept the discomfort you will feel from repeated failed attempts; It may seem strange advice, but the results are worth it. Mistakes make us smarter and stepping out of our comfort zone makes us stronger, both essential for self-development.

14. When have unpleasant surprises in life set you on a better path than you expected?

When things do not go as planned in life, calm down and deal with it in a sporty spirit; Then do your best to adapt to the new situation, and accept the fact that you will not always get what you want, but that life will eventually lead you to achieve your big goal.

15. What have you learned from the past that will benefit you in the future?

Don't let your fear of past events affect your future results. Focus on your present and the results you can achieve now, not on what you lost in the past. You will always have difficulties, but often the biggest obstacles are those that result from our negative thinking; Whether something is an obstacle or an opportunity for self-development depends on how we see it. So don't look at what you lost as a failure, but as as a learning experience.

16. What is the best step you can take now?

Every negative event, situation, or person in your life is an opportunity to develop your personality. As you become stronger, and wiser.

17. What is priceless right now?

As you go on with your life, do not forget to live it, and do not think that you will miss a thing if you give enough attention to your present, for there is always so much splendor that needs your attention; So take an interest in the wonderful things happening around you right now, even if it takes some effort to find them.

18. When was the last time you relaxed?

Relax, you are good enough, do what you have to do, breathe deeply, forget the past, and live fully in the present.

19. Who are the people you should cut out of your life?

Over seven billion people are living on this planet, so why would you allow just a few people to destroy your happiness?

Of course, you can't choose the people you meet in life beforehand, but after you meet them, you can choose who you want to spend time with; So be grateful for the people in your life who made it better, as you should be grateful for the people who walked out of your life, who were one of the reasons for your misery.

20. How have past experiences of rejection affected your present?

Do not allow the situations in which you were previously rejected to influence your thinking now, get rid of these memories, and note that sometimes you have to do what you think you are beyond your ability, until you know that you could have done it, and sometimes it takes more than one attempt.

Do not despair if you fail in the first attempt, you can still try again, and you can try again until you achieve success, and often the wrong choices lead us to the right paths in the end, all you have to do is trust your capabilities until you achieve that.

In conclusion

Life is full of confusing questions, but wisdom, or even courage, is to ask yourself the right questions, as they are the only ones that lead you to a better understanding of yourself and your purpose in life, and you can waste your life in fear if you avoid the obvious facts, or ask negative questions that express your pity for yourself.

On the other hand, you can be grateful for what you have achieved so far, that you have persevered despite all the difficulties, and that life is still ahead of you with its beauty, opportunities and even troubles; So the question becomes: “What do I want to do as a next step?”