3 Lessons and Values to Boost Your Self-confidence
A sense of self is the "mysterious trait" that governs our lives and allows us to recognize who we are. We place a great deal of importance on self-confidence because it is a crucial component of our complex sense of self.
Instead of coming from our bodies, our self-confidence grows on its own if we stop defining ourselves in relation to our bodies and do not interfere with its development.
Self-confidence rises and falls, as it is not a constant. So, it is a changing and evolving process. Self-confidence develops in our minds by going through experiences and learning from them. It is our ability to be certain that we can adapt to life's circumstances relatively effectively and simultaneously enjoy the progress of our lives.
It is important to always remember that we can sabotage our self-confidence through our negative thoughts. Memories of the past hurt us unless we learn from them. Our desires will affect us negatively in the future unless we can manage them.
Learning from experiences leads to separate stages of development, from the physical to the spiritual, which all come together to form a single sense of self.
The results of our development are easy to notice on the physical level. The child starts off sitting, progresses to walking, and eventually runs. With each step, their confidence grows. Regarding the emotional level, a child is under the control of their feelings and motivations.
They will be able to experience emotions in all of their variety and intensity as they get older. They will make good use of this energy by learning how to act quickly to help in an emergency or to wait patiently and think until they calm down and find a solution.
We go through three phases on the social level: Complete reliance on others comes first, followed by independence as we study, work, and build our careers, and finally mutual dependence as we come together to form families and communities while still retaining a healthy level of independence.
When our development is complete in this way, we need only look at a few successful actors, athletes, or politicians to understand the negative effects of having too much or too little self-confidence. In the short term, we can fool ourselves, but in the long run, it is silly to live with multiple selves under the false impression that we can keep them apart.
3 Lessons to Boost Your Self-confidence
- Refrain from bad thinking by avoiding resorting to external means, such as drug abuse, alcohol, smoking, or binge eating, to deal with the fear and anxiety resulting from difficult circumstances.
- Do not give in to the desire to control others and the world through fighting, domineering, bullying, and negative criticism.
- Avoid ruining our lives by standing still without achieving anything.
Our job is to learn these lessons over and over again on deeper levels to develop our minds, thus boosting our self-confidence.
3 Basic Types of Values
1. Taking responsibility
We do not bear any responsibility for ourselves when we are young. Over time, we become completely responsible for ourselves. We begin our lives without having any choice, but we slowly discover that if we want to possess self-confidence, we have to take full responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and experiences. During every moment of our lives, we will decide to take appropriate and effective actions.
2. Daily life values
Daily life values are those we want to acquire and retain. The values we follow and our ability to achieve our goals are reflections of our confidence.
Self-confidence requires that we decide and live according to a clear hierarchy of values. When we are immature, our motivations and desires drive us to choose our values. As we grow in awareness and self-confidence, we take on higher values like cooperation, dedication, loyalty, and respect.
3. Spiritual values
We become wiser when we realize that our progress is based on the decision to tolerate and accept the idea of insecurity and uncertainty. Complete and mature self-confidence reflects the extent to which our values are compatible with the following core values: Love, work, tolerance, gratitude, and humility.
By acting responsibly and in accordance with these values, we avoid harming ourselves or others or being exposed to abuse. Though we deep down know that our faith in the mystery of love and truth keeps us safe and secure, we nevertheless experience feelings of loneliness and fear from time to time.
Our lives are filled with joy as we persevere because of the complete confidence we have gained as a result of the pain and frustration we have encountered during our growth.