Determination and the Power of Passion

“Determination without passion may lead to achievement, but will it make you happy?” “It's not that I'm so smart, but it's just that I stay with problems longer.” - Albert Einstein When I started writing about how to foster determination in children years ago, I thought I had found a magical solution to parenting.

Note: This article is based on the blog post by Christine Carter, in which she tells us about her personal experience with determination.

Early research by renowned psychologist Angela Duckworth in her new book, Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, has shown that determination, perseverance, and passion for long-term goals are one of the best predictors of high-level performance, whether in schools, universities, or at work. This seems fascinating because while we can't control children's intelligence or our own, we can develop determination, which considerably affects their odds of success.

Most of my success was due to my constant and relentless pursuit of getting things done. In high school and college, I studied harder than anyone I knew, and I did all my homework and repeated it more than once.

On the other hand, I also attribute my anxiety disorder in my early twenties to my determination and relentless pursuit of tasks. Until my mid-thirties, I did everything I thought I should do to the best of my ability, as I did everything everyone thought I should do. I have satisfied people to the fullest.

I would not have achieved anything without determination and perseverance, and I would have reached the maximum of Duckworth's Grit Scale - the scale of determination measures how well individuals can maintain focus, attention, and perseverance in achieving long-term goals, giving myself a high score in both:

• I don't give up easily.
• I am a hardworking person.
• I finish all the things I start with.
• I'm diligent.
• I have faced all obstacles to overcome important challenges.

But in fact, I wasn't as determined as Duckworth on the Duckworth determination scale; Duckworth defines determination as perseverance and passion to achieve long-term goals.

For the most part, I lacked the passion associated with the equation of determination. I was driven by fear rather than love, I knew what others wanted me to pursue, and I was able to achieve it; and because I was so clear about what others expected of me, I sometimes felt unsure about what I really wanted to pursue myself.

For this reason, I highly believe that determination is not something we should measure in adolescents to see if they can transcend stress, nor should we admire or reinforce this trait because to do so means that we are constantly looking for idealism, as determination without emotion may lead to achievement. Still, it is a dismal and worrying achievement at best.

How can you boost determination and passion?

Actual determination, which measures passion and perseverance, is an effective strategy for success and happiness; something we can easily foster for ourselves and our children.

1. Find and nurture passion

If you're a parent or teacher looking to foster determination in children, the first step is to let go of the idea of what you want for them, observe what they're passionate about, and then smoothly support their passion.

I know what children care about; they need to try many things. Children will never know that they are passionate about playing tennis, reading books, climbing mountains, or playing the piano if they do not get a chance to try these things. Therefore, the presence of parents, teachers, and coaches is very critical, as we must be ready and able to provide the necessary tools for everything they want to try.

In addition, we must be ready to make the initial interest in children develop because of the sense of fun, and it must be easy at first. Adults can encourage it, but they must remember that fun is the best method. Real passion never begins with hard work and practice, but it starts with actual interest and fun.

You can apply this to yourself, so pay attention to what you are looking forward to and practice ignoring what others expect or even want from you. For example, does thinking about a particular project or activity make you feel comfortable and free, or burden you? Striving for the things you fear may make you a persistent person, but in the end, it won't make you strong-willed or happy.

2. Practice overlooking discomfort

Because life involves many emotions, such as disappointment, risk-taking, pain, and even failure, we need to accept that we will sometimes feel comfortable and sometimes uncomfortable if we are to continue facing challenges toward our goals.

The solution is to notice where your comfort zone is located because it is often the one that hinders your success and happiness. Ironically, perfectionism was my comfort zone. I was comfortable meeting the expectations of others from me constantly, and I was worried and uncomfortable doing things that could disappoint others. It was difficult for me to have the courage to take care of the things that excite my passion.

However, we need to have the courage to do the things that make us uncomfortable without over-anxiety or stress. Sometimes, severe things are just tough things. There is difficulty or even pain, but they are not worth worry. There is nothing to be afraid of.

The easiest way to increase our ability - and frankly, our desire - to feel uncomfortable is to put ourselves in situations that make us uncomfortable, so take small steps and practice staying calm despite feeling uncomfortable and upset, breathe deeply, relax your shoulders, observe and accept discomfort, and be afraid of nothing.

Engage in intense discussions, take risks in relationships by showing people your reality, share how you feel, notice how others struggle and connect with them, notice how they feel uncomfortable and don't fear it, and do the right thing, even when it's hard.

These days, I don't know how determined I am on the Duckworth scale. I'm training to be strong in some things, unassertive in others, and in the same way that a high IQ can make people socially awkward and fail in their relationships. I believe that having a very high perseverance score was a threat to my happiness.

Is determination more important than intelligence, as Duckworth's early research showed?

It turns out that determination - at least according to the way it was measured in research - is not a panacea, and other research on determination has shown that the Duckworth gauge directed at determination is not as helpful at predicting success as the original research-led us to believe.

At the same time, it is clear that true determination related to perseverance and passion is something we want for our children and ourselves. Fortunately, we can learn and practice the skills that make us brave. When we identify the things that we are excited about and develop our skills, then we will need to be perseverant in the pursuit of our passion, so pay attention to everything that is happening around you. Nothing else will have an actual impact on you.