3 Questions Can Build Your Confidence When You Break Down

According to a study conducted by KPMG, 67% of high-performing female executives need more support to build self-confidence to feel that they can become leaders in their field, and this lack of confidence has led most of them to retreat from pursuing job opportunities, demanding higher salaries, changing their positions, and so on.

That is where Desiree Cocroft, a certified coach for personal and professional transformation, specializes in helping women entrepreneurs and leaders not only know their life choices but also pursue them. “I am excited to help people overcome their negative bias, so they can make a real change and do the work they want,” Cocroft says.

3 Questions Can Build Your Confidence When You Break Down:

If you want to boost your self-confidence, she recommends asking the following questions to soothe your negative inner voice and boldly move forward with your goals:

1. What failure did you learn something from?

If you hear the word “no” from many potential clients or are struggling to achieve a financial goal in your business, this is the right time to ask yourself this question to build trust. Cocroft explains: “One of my clients was having a hard time making a business decision because she kept thinking about how she was not getting the wanted result the first time my client tried to take this step. Then, the client asked herself about the lesson she learned from that failure and not about the mistake she made. She only could move on. Focusing on what she learned will help you fight the enemy of progress: idealism.”

If you don't enroll enough people in your program, you'll probably realize you haven't promoted it enough, and if you don't achieve your earnings goal, you'll probably realize that you've been focusing too much on one-on-one sessions and haven't had enough time for group training. “Even when things do not go perfectly - especially because nothing is perfect - you can still achieve success by thinking and growing,” Cocroft says. “Having something to strive for is good, and losing purpose is not entirely bad. Even though it does not make you feel comfortable, failure is necessary for your development as a leader because it is a form of feedback, and you can continue to rely on it by viewing your failures as chances to learn rather than obstacles to overcome.”

2. What did you personally achieve that was successful?

“When you face a lot of rejection in your career, it can help to build confidence in your personal life, as you will realize there is a lot of overlap between the two,” Cocroft  says. In addition, research shows that celebrating gains and enjoying success leads to happiness and positive thoughts and behaviors.”

Your personal success can be linked to anything, whether it is learning a foreign language, having strong ties with friends or family members, reading a book weekly, or anything else. Cocroft says: “When I felt that one of my clients was drowning in her workload, I made her remember a personal success, so she told me about a situation she went through, in which she was able to improve her health through regular exercise. Remembering her systematic approach to becoming physically stronger enabled her to become emotionally stronger at that moment, and she began to reject job opportunities that were not suitable for her and provide space for those that were.”

Additionally, retelling your experience to a friend can help you relive one of these accomplishments and boost your sense of safety and confidence.

3. What do others see in you?

This question is ideal when you are at an impasse and trying to figure out your next move. “We are often the worst critics of ourselves; we do not usually see success in the small things we achieve every day, but others notice it,” Cocroft says.

You have fans all around you like friends, colleagues, coaches, and mentors are the people who see you at a high level. “Best of all,” Cockcroft says, “they will not hesitate to tell you about your best strengths when you ask them about it; the things they say can surprise you, inspiring you to keep taking action or making appropriate changes.

Take a survey of the top five people you know, love, and trust, and send them an email asking them what strengths they see in you, what obstacles they realize you've overcome, and what inspires them in you. Asking for feedback on your creativity, brilliance, or perseverance is easier than discussing it, so why not do it to boost your self-assurance before acting?