20 Tips for Dealing with Difficult People

While my wife, Angel, and I were enjoying a backyard barbecue at our friend Sarah's house, a 16-year-old boy that she was raising at her home, named Cody, received an unexpected visit from his real mother. She was a woman who has been in and out of prison and rehab centers throughout life. And even though Sarah was a little hesitant about it, she let Cody and his mom talk privately on the front porch, and we would sometimes watch them from the living room window just to make sure everything was okay.

Cody's mom was tough and immediately started bringing up painful memories from the past, and after about 20 minutes of conversation, she said to him "I see you're angry, I just wish I could go back and raise you again to change your identity and your upbringing for the better."  And Sarah was about to step out onto the balcony to intervene when Cody calmly replied, "I'm not angry, I'm perfectly fine and proud of who I am, and maybe you should go back in time and change your character instead," and then politely asked her to leave.

I liked Cody's response on so many levels. It takes a lot of courage, especially at the age of 16, so to defend yourself with tact whenever you deal with a difficult or hostile person, remember how Cody treated his mother; Just take a stand and set boundaries. This is your life, you may not be able to control all the things people do to you, but you can decide not to let their actions and opinions hurt your heart and mind, and you can decide who to walk with tomorrow, and who to leave behind today.

Here are 20 tips you can follow to deal with difficult people:

1. Stop letting people drag you into unnecessary situations:

Don't waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who have always proven to get you wrong. Als, don't measure your intelligence or worth by the number of conversations you gain, but by the number of times you say this sentence: "This talk is unnecessary and not worth my time."

2. Stop letting people affect you with their negativity:

Positivity is a choice, so choose wisely and be clever enough to move away from the negativity around you. It's not worth it to concern yourself with meaningless tragedies.

3. Stop letting people make you feel ashamed of your past:

Scars remind us that our past is real and that we are over it. Every scar has a story, so don't be afraid to talk about it.

4. Stop listening to those who scold you for your mistakes:

To become strong and wise, you must have the courage to make mistakes. So, allow yourself to be a beginner because no one starts out with being perfect.

5. Stop letting others blind you to who you really are:

It is enough to try to outdo yourself compared to who you were yesterday, so prove yourself to yourself and not to others.

6. Stop letting people bully you:

Bullying is not acceptable, and there is no freedom on earth that gives anyone the right to assault your character. Unfortunately, some people will not be happy until they bother you, but what you have to do is have the courage to stand up to them. Don't give them any chance, as no one has the power to underestimate you unless you give it to them. 

7. Stop hanging out with fake friends:

Who is the real friend? They are those who love you as you are, but still inspire you to be a better person, so be a true friend to others and keep only true friends close to you.

8. Stop letting people lie to you repeatedly:

If someone deceives you once, shame on them, but if they deceive you twice, shame on you. If you find someone lying to you, you have to confront them. Some people will lie to you repeatedly trying to make you repeat their lies until they become true. Don't participate in their nonsense, and don't let their lies be your reality.

9. Don't allow people to take advantage of you:

Sometimes people don't notice the things we do for them until we stop doing them, but this is not right. You deserve better, and you deserve to be with people who make you happy and don't leave you in a bad situation.

10. Don't allow people to treat you like a substitute:

Don't just be someone's replacement; That is, when they need you in their free time. If they can't be there for you when you need them the most, then they are not worth your time.

11. Don't allow the wrong people to stand between you and the right people:

Don't let bad people keep you away from the people who love you, and spend your time with those who make your world brighter just by being in it. Either one day you will regret not doing it or you will say, "I'm glad I did."

12. Don't let hateful people motivate you to hate them:

The spiritual leader Gandhi once said, “An eye for an eye will only make the world blind.” And apart from hating someone, never let hate build up in your heart. Fighting hate with hate only hurts you more. When you decide to hate someone, you automatically start digging two graves, one for your enemy and one for yourself.

13. Don't allow people to grow grudges in your mind:

Remember that the first to apologize is the bravest, and the first to forgive is the strongest, and the first to move forward is always the happiest.

14. Don't allow people to use your past to poison your present:

Life is too short to spend it tirelessly thinking about the past and dealing with people who refuse to let go of it. Some people just can't stand that you are moving on with your life, so they will try to drag you into the past. don't help them by falling into their trap, as letting go of the past is your first step towards happiness.

15. Don't let people convince you that change is bad:

The things we can't change often end up changing us, and that change happens for a reason. It won't be easy, but it will be worth it in the end.

16. Don't let people steer you away from your goals:

If you can smile when no one is around, then your smile really comes from the heart, so don't let others stand between you and the ideas and activities that motivate you.

17. Don't let people ruin your dreams:

Life will test you to see how serious you are in following a certain path, and sooner or later you may face negative reactions from others, and when this happens, remember not to let anyone crush your soul. If you are passionate about something, follow it regardless of what anyone else thinks. This is how dreams come true.

18. Don't allow negative people to convince you not to make an effort:

Hard times often lead to greatness, so don't lose hope. You will eventually be of value, as the beginnings of great things are always the hardest.

19. Don't let people convince you of their quick plans that worked for them:

Anything worth achieving takes time and dedicated effort, and honestly I used to believe that wishes change things, but now I know they change us and we change things.

20. Don't allow people to tell you that you need more to be happy:

Contentment is the first step towards happiness, so make sure you appreciate what you have, and thank God for the little things in life.