Three Tips for Developing Successful Habits

How much time do you spend thinking about the things you "should" have done in your life? It is easy to set goals and dreams for yourself.

Note: This article is adapted from blogger Stacey Hanke, in which she talks about the importance of raising our expectations of ourselves in order to develop the habits needed to achieve success.

However, we often fail to achieve the goals we set for ourselves. We want to live a better life, pursue a more important career, and have a stronger influence, but many of us do not reach our goals, not because we don't want to achieve them but because we are not prepared to raise our standards high enough to make a real and lasting change.

When we commit to raising our standards, we begin to expect more of ourselves, we demand better results, and we become willing to work hard to achieve them. By raising our expectations, we develop new habits. When we replace the phrase “it is preferable” with the phrase “it must be” and change “maybe” to “definitely”, then the real change takes place. Assuming responsibility requires constant perseverance, which eventually leads to the adoption of new habits that go beyond words and push us into action.

This change is not easy. It is difficult to abandon old habits, and it is even more difficult to develop new ones, but when we raise our expectations of ourselves, we are committed to hard work that leads to the adoption of permanent habits that rise above the noise of daily life, command our attention and respect, and give us influence and credibility among those around us.

Any professional athlete will tell you that skill is not enough. There are many athletes with amazing abilities who are not dedicated to acquiring new and better habits through daily practice and taking responsibility. Skill will not be enough. Professionals will testify that the constant desire to adopt better habits is the source of success when combined with daily practice and application, which creates momentum.

I work with many leaders who believe that the skills needed to succeed and influence today are all they need to be successful in the future. They reach out to me confused or even desperate. This is because they don't have the credibility among their peers, decision makers, or even their teams to rise to a higher level. Their skills as good communicators prevent them from developing the new habits necessary to become skilled communicators. The better they improve, the higher the expectations of others, but the only difference is that they do not raise their standards; This is why they fail to tell themselves about the things that need to change on the ground.

Imagine how your life would change if you raised your expectations of yourself, demanded a better level of work, and took responsibility for the efforts needed to develop new habits.

Three tips to start changing your expectations for better success:

1. Adjust your attitude:

Saying: "I'd better go to the gym" does not mean that you will lose weight, but saying: "I should go to the gym", and then going to it will do, and saying: "I should understand why no one implements my ideas in my workplace" will not qualifies you for promotion, say instead: "I have to find out what I lack in communication skills."

Changing the way you think begins with changing your attitude. Change happens when you stop wishing and start taking the necessary steps to achieve your dream. You take responsibility for your progress and decide what needs to change. Responsibility is about attitude, and attitude changes behavior.

2. Take responsibility for your mistakes.

You may not receive respect in your workplace because you are always late, or maybe you are always distracted. You may not have leverage because you don't always keep your commitments, or maybe you lack the communication skills needed to inspire others to act.

It is necessary to identify your mistakes and take responsibility for them, to have a clear idea of ​​what to change; So seek feedback from people you trust or guidance from a coach or mentor; Either way, it's important that you listen to their opinions and take responsibility. Only then will you be ready to embrace the changes needed to develop new habits.

3. Work for long-term results:

We have always been led to believe that a person is capable of developing new habits within 21 days, but the source of this inaccurate fact is a medical study in which a plastic surgeon determined that patients needed at least 21 days to absorb the changes that occurred in their bodies after undergoing plastic surgery; Over the years, we heard the summary of this study so much that we believed that developing a habit does not really require more than 21 days, but this belief is wrong; In fact, it takes 66 days to develop permanent habits so that they become part of our behavior.

Habits are formed through the continuous practice of the same actions, and requires unwavering commitment.

When you raise your standards and expect more from yourself, your attitude changes, and blame turns into responsibility, which motivates you to change. Influence and respect lead to salary increases and promotions. So if you want to elevate your life and career, raise your standards, change your attitude, and realize that skill alone is not enough, take responsibility for your current habits, understand where you need to improve, and commit to change by persevering in putting in the effort needed daily, only then will you gain the authority needed to achieve true success.