How to Reduce Your Tasks in a Smart Way?

I have always been afraid of making mistakes so as not to disappoint the other people in my life. I felt that it was essential to know my personal and work responsibilities, but what I feared most was making a mistake at work because that might mean they will never hire a woman in this position again.

Note: This article is taken from author Tiffany Dufu, in which she talks to us about her experience in reducing her tasks in various areas of life.

What has happened to me is that I have reached a moment that has changed my life where I have not been able to fulfill all my obligations. I have not been able to do everything perfectly. For me, it happened when my first child was born, but for others, their lives may change due to a serious illness or finally getting their dreams promoted and realizing that management is more complex than they thought, or that the pandemic is sweeping the entire world.

Having failed many tasks, I had a surprising awakening. Even though I had lost control of many aspects of my life, the world was not over.

No one called me to tell me that they didn't love me anymore, I didn't lose my job, and no one came to arrest me because I didn't pay a traffic ticket. So, I started to wonder why many of us felt so much constant pressure, and our performance had to be at a very high level all the time.

Maybe what we really need to do is let go of the unrealistic expectations that make us think we have to succeed in all areas, and instead , we need to “do less and achieve more” in three steps:

1. Identify the areas that are most important to you.
2. Find out what you hope to achieve and how to best achieve it.
3. Involve others in your goal.

Let me make it easy for you:

The first and most effective step is to be clear about what is most important to you and your life. One of the most powerful exercises I love to do, published by Stephen Covey in his book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, is to imagine your eulogy and the end of your life.

I know this sounds sad and frustrating, but since so many people worldwide lose their lives due to the pandemic, it's something to do. So, what do you want a friend, family member, or co-worker to say about you at your funeral? Maybe you don't want them to stand up and say, “He's done a lot of things on their to-do list every day.” Instead, you might want them to say something about the impact you've had on the world.

The second step involves focusing on what you hope to achieve in the critical areas of your life and how you will achieve it in the best and optimal way. At the same time, my career is important to me, but what is essential in this area is that I seek to empower women and girls worldwide.

My marriage is important, but what really matters is that I nurture a healthy partnership; my children are obviously important, but what matters is that I raise them to be citizens aware of what's happening in the world.

Then, you can move on to what you're good at and how you use your unique abilities and skills to work toward your goals, and if you don't know your best traits, one great exercise to help you recognize them is to talk to the people in your life.

Ask 10 people who have dealt with you at different stages of your life to tell you about the best situations they have seen you in, the things you do well with little effort, and things you alone can do. Listen to  what they say; it will be useful to write their responses. After writing them on paper, circle the words, phrases, and topics that continue to appear or that have an impact on you.

The third step involves involving other people in your goal. You need to get the participation of the people in your life, as you can't do this and not tell anyone. I tried this, and it didn't work.

Let's start with the field of work because it is the most challenging area for most people, but you can do this. When you talk with your manager, try to focus on what interests them. Usually, the most important thing for managers is the results they want their team members to achieve in a certain period.

Suppose you've decided that you're good at building relationships and are a huge benefit in your career when establishing meaningful collaborations and want to spend more time doing so. You can frame your request to your boss by saying, “If I spend more time with clients and a little less time on the management side, I can get our company to its strategic goal. Would you like to discuss reprioritizing work and maybe give someone else on the team a chance so we can achieve the goal?”

Then if a colleague feels the impact on them, you have to be proactive and go to them and say, “I just want to tell you that I have an idea, and I know it sounds scary, but I really think it will increase my productivity and the productivity of the team, and I want to tell you in advance what I'm going to do so that we can have a conversation about how it affects you, and make sure that it doesn't negatively affect you.” Being proactive while communicating is critical.

As for the home, the most important thing is to take a humble and sympathetic approach and acknowledge what your family members have already gone through. They may have had to deal with your confusion, stress, and the repercussions of this stress.

You might have a conversation with your kids like this: “I know this sounds weird to have with you, but I really want to be a good parent. I've been feeling very stressed and nervous, and I feel like there are many things I need to do to be a good parent, so I get moody sometimes because I can't do them.

I know I'm screaming, but I don't mean it, and I feel it would be better to focus on the most important things to be good, so can we talk about your three most important things? I  also hope that you will help me do some tasks at home, as this will really help me to be better.”

Every time you stop doing things that don't align with your ultimate goal, you show that behavior and humility to others.

Those of us who are perfect want to keep doing everything, even when it makes us angry or exhausted. When you make a mistake at home, I think you'll discover that the expectations you place on yourself are much higher than those of the people who love you. You can trim your to-do list by asking your loved ones what tasks are most important.

And remember that when you give up some of your tasks thoughtfully in different areas of your life, you will benefit yourself and help everyone around you. Every time you set limits, focus on using your unique talents, and stop doing things that do not correspond to your ultimate goal, you show this behavior and humility and softness in front of others. This is something we need to improve in this world.