Body Language Mistakes and Ten Tips for Improving (Part II)

Many people try to improve their body language to facilitate communication and get close to others, but it is not easy for many, as we witnessed in the first part of the article in which the author talked about her challenges. But in this second and final part, the author shows us how she overcame these challenges and offers some valuable tips that everyone can benefit from.

Note: This article is taken from the author Celestine Chua, in which she talks about introverted body language and provides some tips for improving it.

Show More Open Body Language:

Since then, I have been working on this issue. I was reconsidering my thoughts and beliefs, and I was trying to show more open body language through the following steps:

1. Remove personal space boundaries:

I am no longer trying to put a barrier between myself and the world. Everyone is entitled to some personal space, but the way I enforced this space in the past was very severe. So now is the time to break down the barriers that divide my personal space from the world around me.

2. Involve the other party in my thinking process:

I let myself show my feelings to the other person, give indications when I think, make some sounds, look deep, think loudly, and keep eye contact even when I think.

3. Soften my gaze:

I did that by smiling, keeping eye contact without staring, laughing at the right times, and relaxing my facial muscles.

4. Show some movements to make the conversation more interactive:

For example, random movements such as combing my hair, gently moving my hand to express myself, and touching my face are slow and smooth movements that I add to the conversation, not fast and sudden movements, because they may distract the other (unless the speed is to make a point).

5. Demonstrate more positive body language:

For example, when someone talks to me, I smile sweetly while hearing their speech rather than stare at them while analyzing what they say, as I used to do. I also used to hug my bag to my chest or put it in my lap, but now I put it on my side and no longer fold my arms.

I started following these steps just a week ago, but I feel like I've made good progress; it's like I've been acting this way all my life, and I'm looking forward to applying them to a deeper level.

10 Tips to Improve Communication Through Body Language:

Here are 10 tips to connect with others in a more open way through body language:

1. Smile more.
2. Keep the space in front of your upper torso open, in other words, try not to cross your arms, put your bag on your lap, hug it, or do anything that covers the upper front of your body. Closing this space sends a signal to the other person, "Don't talk to me, I'm not interested in talking to anyone." On the other hand, keeping the area open makes you seem more friendly.
3. maintain eye contact; it is a very important element, it helps to build bonds, and assures the other person that you are listening well, but do not stare too long; Rather, look away from time to time, to give the person some space, and then look back after a while. Constant staring may annoy some people.
4. Show confidence in yourself, and do not twist or sit in a way that shows anxiety, your body is not only supposed to take up space, it must also control it, and here lies the importance of self-confidence.
5. For ladies, if you have to rest your head on your hand, keep the inner side of your arm and palm pointed outside at the person, rather than leaning on your wrist, and place the outside of your arm facing the other person. The first position makes you look more friendly.
6. Reduce distracting movements, such as finger tapping, nail biting, skin peeling, and dandruff picking. Some of these habits are very bad anyway, so it's useful to give them up.
7. Slowly speaking; If you speak quickly, you have to slow down, especially if you have to repeat your words because this means that the other person will not be able to keep up with you. If you have to touch your hair, put a leg on top of the other or make any movement, do so at normal speed. Fast and sudden movements, such as suddenly lifting your leg to move it from side to side, flicking your hair, or waving your hands hard can surprise the other person, distracting them from the conversation.
8. Get close to the other person; Make moves to bring them closer to you instead of pushing them away. If you feel that the person is suspicious, a harasser, or something like that, keep your distance. Actions that keep the other person away and set a boundary between you and them include crossing arms, placing a leg over the other, putting things between you and them, and increasing physical distance between you and them, while actions that bring you closer to them include reducing the physical distance between you and them (in an appropriate way), smiling, shaking hands, looping arms (between close friends), maintaining eye contact, and expressing spontaneous gestures towards the person.
9. Express your feelings sincerely. When you are sad, surprised, or happy, express your sadness, surprise, or happiness, do not hold your emotions inside; Let what's in your heart come out.
10. Be considerate of every person; after all, every human being is different.

The previous tips I shared are a bit idealistic, and not all people are ready for them. Some people may take a long time to get through to you. They may be afraid to show their emotions. Some people may be very shy and afraid of eye contact. Some people may get surprised and defensive when you remove barriers between you and them.

In Conclusion:

You need to assess each person, adopt body language that will help you communicate with them in a better way, and gradually work to gain their affection. So follow the previous tips as a model, and it's okay to improvise if the need arises. Some people may be very sensitive, requiring you to initially communicate with them in a cautious and discreet manner before moving to a friendlier and more open language. Remember that there is no one-size-fits-all style.