3 Constructive Tips to Benefit from Job Jealousy

Being jealous can help you move toward your goal if you correctly deal with it. You may have felt jealous when one of your co-workers succeeded at work, whether they were able to gain an important client or the management rewarded them for their exceptional performance in front of the entire company or celebrated them in the media.

So, you are happy for their success, but you are also jealous. Don't worry, jealousy is a natural thing that we all feel from time to time, so that someone may joke to their friend saying, "I am very jealous" or "I am jealous of you."

Tania Menon and Leigh Thomson wrote in the Harvard Business Review about jealousy at work, stressing that these feelings can be harmful:

"Jealousy harms relationships, disrupts teams, undermines organizational performance, and most of all, harms its owner. When you think about another person's success, your self-esteem is shaken, and you may ignore or neglect your performance and perhaps neglect your entire career. It is challenging to deal with feelings of jealousy because it is difficult to admit that we carry such socially unacceptable feelings, which leads us to hide and deny our feelings. So, things get worse, and repressed jealousy appears clearly."

3 Constructive Tips to Benefit from Job Jealousy

Jealousy may waste yours and others' chances, so be careful dealing with it because it is a double-edged sword, it may be helpful and motivating, and it may be dangerous. So, in this article, we will give you three tips to take advantage of jealousy instead of suppressing or ignoring it:

1. Ask yourself what your jealousy is telling you

For example, if your colleague is promoted to a position much higher than you and you are not very happy with this, what does that tell you? Do you want more responsibility? Or respect? Or the position?

Gretchen Rubin, the author of the famous books Better Than Before, The Happiness Project, and Happier at Home, says that she was not jealous of her friends who were advancing in the legal profession; rather, they were jealous of her when she became a famous writer, and she listened to her feelings and cared about her, and this motivated her to leave the legal profession to become a very successful writer.

Then your jealousy may tell you that you have to think differently or more about your potential. There may be something you learn from the person you're jealous of. For example, you may discover that this person is not afraid to ask for help from others, which has helped them a lot to succeed, while you aren't. People love to help and build relationships, and that may strengthen your friendships and social relationships and become mutually beneficial.

2. Remember all the good in you

We usually forget all the positive aspects of our personalities and the achievements we have made when we compare ourselves to others and are jealous of them. Don't do that. Instead, consider five areas where you met or exceeded your professional goals or received positive feedback. You can also print emails that recognize your effort and hard work and occasionally refer to them. Success is based on success, and the idea is to focus on the good things because what you focus on increases.

Leadership expert Ron Ashkenas wrote in the Harvard Business Review (HBr) an article entitled "When It's Hard to Celebrate Your Colleague's Success" and said, "Don't focus on others; just focus on yourself. Although comparing yourself to others is normal and may be motivating, it often leads to jealousy, especially if you don't consider yourself, so try to measure your current progress as you were in the past."

You may be more productive than you realize, so a simple procedure like measuring achievements may change the way you think, especially when you feel jealous.

Ashkenas writes, “While identifying your emotional triggers and achievements may reduce feelings of jealousy, you may not be happy with other people's successes, and if you feel threatened every time your colleague does a good job, you can eliminate your resentment by doing one simple thing: reminding yourself of your strengths and successes.”

3. Do not deny feelings of jealousy

Belittling others and viewing them with a vindictive eye is a dangerous way of thinking that may hurt others and damage your reputation. Jealousy may cause someone to question another person's success or response, but doing so hurts both them and you. You won't improve as a person if you do this, and you won't be able to accomplish your goals.

We regrettably tend to reject and despise the value of others' enviable qualities, such as beauty or attractiveness, and we feel better by trivializing their accomplishments by saying things like, "Well, he was just lucky" or "He got that job because he was a flatterer."

Speaking in this manner casts doubt on the legitimacy of the organization as a whole, which hurts you and the organization and hinders your ability to succeed as a leader.

Jealousy is not a good emotion, so most of us automatically deny or suppress it, but by disclosing and considering it, you limit its control over you and your relationships, and you can harness it to your advantage, which benefits you, your team, and your entire organization.