Seven Steps to Controlling Your Thoughts and Mind

If you want to learn how to control your thoughts, the Himalayas are the place to go. Monks lived there and studied the mind there for a very long time, and these monks are still a mystery to many people.

This is due to the fact that they have mastered their own minds and have attained mental acuity, which is a key component of their disciplined craft and a crucial step on the path to enlightenment for these monks, and many of us find it challenging to master our own minds.

Of course, you don't have to become a monk to learn how to control your thoughts, but you can benefit from some techniques that will help you, and you'll see that some of these techniques will help you feel free and have control over your thoughts.

In this article, you can learn how to do this and discover how these techniques can help you feel less stressed and anxious while achieving your goals and desires.

Positive Thinking Benefits

You must understand the profound influence your thoughts have on your life before we discuss the steps. Since thoughts are the source of feelings and since they control how you feel, they have the power to stop you from acting to get meaningful results as long as you are not in control of them.

But when you control your thoughts, you'll be astounded by how many benefits you'll experience. These benefits are summed up by Shahram Heshmat, who holds a Ph.D. in Philosophy:

• Helping you achieve your long-term goals.
• Less anxiety.
• Addiction protection.
• Improve physical health.
• Build better relationships.
• Gain more psychological flexibility.
• Achieve happiness.

One of your most valuable mental assets is your thoughts, so it's crucial to master them. They are like a raging river, so if you are good at swimming, you will be able to swim against the current and guide yourself where you need to go.

Controlling your thoughts helps you manage them better, so negative thoughts will have little effect on you, even if it is impossible to get rid of them. Your ability to manage them will make these thoughts have only a small impact on you.

When facing challenges, this becomes even more crucial, so you must learn how to manage your thoughts.

Seven steps that will help you mentally advance

1. Understand Thoughts

"What are thoughts?" should be the first thing you ask yourself. Even though we have thoughts constantly and in various forms, this is an interesting question that we rarely give much thought to.

Thoughts can manifest in various ways, including through the act of thinking. It's normal that the question we just posed caused you to think because questions normally trigger thoughts.

The automatic method is another way that thoughts are generated, where thoughts happen on their own and change constantly, whether we like it or not. It is like an ever-flowing river, as we previously stated.

However, conscious, deliberate thought is one of our greatest gifts as humans. Animals are unable to think; that's why we are the dominant species on Earth. And our thoughts, whether positive or negative, can have a significant impact on our feelings and behavior.

Your strong thoughts shape your reality, and if you don't question them, taking them as assumptions, they will negatively impact the quality of your life. This is especially true if you identify with these thoughts, which is common, as most people believe what they think and think what they believe.

In other words, it's a never-ending cycle, as when we think negatively, we experience negatively, and when we experience negatively, we think negatively, and so on.

After repeating this process often enough, you may start to accept your thoughts as facts, which is known as a self-feeding belief. As a result, your attention becomes narrower in line with these thoughts, and you begin looking for evidence to support your beliefs.

You then become a prisoner of your own thoughts when that occurs, but the interesting thing is that you have the ability to oppose this mechanism as a human being. Although most people never even try, you can regain control over your thoughts.

You now have a clearer understanding of what your thoughts are after completing the first step. Observing your thoughts is the next step.

2. Observe Thoughts

Your ability to control your thoughts begins with self-awareness, so be aware of your thoughts as they race through your mind. The best way to develop this skill is to observe your thoughts.

“How do I do this?” you may be wondering. The key lies in an increasingly popular way over time, which is meditation.

Setting an alarm for five minutes, sitting or lying down, and concentrating only on your breathing during that time is a good way to practice meditation.

If you can't control your thoughts, they will keep you distracted for the duration of the exercise, and at first,  it will take you some time to realize that it's happening.

But now you realize that you are thinking, and what you should do is let your thoughts flow without blaming yourself for the thoughts getting out of your control.

You should now focus on the exercise, and whenever you feel your thoughts are getting out of control, return to focus mode.

There are two main benefits to doing this exercise:

The first benefit is the realization that thoughts are like a river that flows continuously and is beyond your control, as there is nothing you can do about that.

The second benefit is that you will start to notice more of your dominant thoughts as you practice consistently and consciously, which will help you become aware of your thought patterns. The thought classification process is another excellent way to develop self-awareness more quickly.

3. Thought Classification

You should now classify your thoughts after becoming more aware of them as they float through your mind. Classifying thoughts provides an extra layer of awareness, and this happens easily by creating mental notes about your thoughts and classifying them into categories.

You can give these categories any name you like; for instance, if you have the thought that you might forget an important date, make a mental note of it, and if this thought makes you feel frustrated, put it in the category of frustration and let it go without resistance.

Another thought might pop up, telling you you're wasting your time. Make a mental note, classify it as anxiety, and let the thought go.

Don't worry about the labels themselves when you complete this exercise; do it with some curiosity, as the more important thing is that you gain a better understanding of the types of thoughts you're having.

With some practice, you'll start to become aware of thought patterns in situations that you encounter on a daily basis. You may become aware of them during heated discussions at work or during arguments with your partner, and these are the first signs of change.

4. Identify Negative Thoughts

You have been practicing increasing your awareness of your thoughts up to this point, which is an essential step if you want to control your thoughts as soon as you feel them.

Identifying negative thoughts is the next step. It might be helpful to mention that negative thoughts are the ones that are the most harmful to us, and they are the ones that worsen the quality of our relationships and cause us to put off tasks. Some of the most destructive thoughts are these:

4.1. Blaming

Self-blame, the blame of others, or external circumstances.

4.2. Comparing

Comparing your current situation to your previous situation or comparing yourself to others.

4.3. Gross thinking

This means all or nothing, and an example of this is thinking that if you don't get what you want now, you will never get anything.

4.4. Mind reading

This means you believe that you know exactly what other people think of you.

It is a great place to start if you find dominant thoughts in the groups you have categorized. Feel free to address any additional negative thoughts you may have if you notice them. But keep in mind that this process takes time, so it's best to isolate and focus on one particular type of thought at a time.

For instance, you might compare yourself to others while scrolling on Instagram or working out at the gym. Processing all the thoughts can be confusing, so isolate this particular thought pattern and focus only on working on it.

5. Understand the Context of Thoughts

Finding the context in which the negative thought appears is necessary now that you have identified the thought itself. This entails being aware of what prompts the thought and causes it to appear. This is critical to understand in order to know what will happen to you when the thought appears and how to respond.

Is the thought's appearance related to where you are, who you are with, or whether it is occurring because of a particular circumstance?

You must examine the rest of the context after identifying when the thought first appears. To do this, you must first identify exactly what you are thinking and then which category your thoughts belong to.

As soon as you have these thoughts, pay attention to how you feel. Then, pay attention to how your feelings affect your thoughts, how your body responds to these feelings and thoughts, and how you act.

You will have a better understanding of negative thinking once you have a complete understanding of the whole context. With this knowledge, you will be equipped to analyze the entire story.

6. Analyze the Story

When we refer to "the story," we mean the stories you make up about yourself and your experiences, as these thoughts are only stories, after all.

The issue is that the majority of people believe their stories without questioning them, which is precisely where the power of questioning and curiosity lies.

We focus on curiosity and questioning because they easily interrupt the spontaneous story. For this interruption to be meaningful, you need to do it intentionally, which requires a lot of self-awareness, which is why you took the five steps listed above.

With time and practice, you will gain a thorough understanding of the pattern thoughts take and the moment that pattern starts, so from that point forward, you will have the choice of asking a question to interrupt negative thoughts or letting them run your story.

You need to arouse your curiosity and not accept the thought right away if you want to interrupt it. Instead, tell yourself that it's an interesting thought and worth discussing.

Then, consider the following questions: Why are you required to believe your thoughts? Why do you think your thoughts will be right? Can you easily let these thoughts go? And if you did so, what would happen?

Keep asking questions to break the cycle of spontaneity that negative thoughts have, as questions are a very powerful weapon. This will help you put the story in a new context and will also help you gain greater control over your thoughts

7. Intentional Practice

With some practice, you'll be able to recognize thought patterns, and instead of having only theoretical knowledge as you do now, you'll be able to recognize these patterns in reality.

With enough practice, you will be able to recognize your thoughts whenever they arise, allowing you to interfere with them.

If you keep working on the previous step, you will eventually be able to question your current thoughts because you will no longer be as easily taken for granted by them; instead, the negative ones will make you more curious.

With training, this mechanism will become automatic for you, allowing you to claim that you have improved your level of mental control and are controlling your thoughts.

When you question your thoughts more often, you will be able to change your beliefs as well, and this will have a tremendous impact on your feelings and behavior.

One last thing to keep in mind is that you should practice these steps enough to gain true self-awareness because it only comes with practice and time and is the only way to be able to interrupt your negative thoughts.

In Conclusion

The steps in this article may seem very simple and easy to apply, and that is true. However, the issue for most people is that after reading this article, they practice it for a short period of time, and if they do not see the desired results, they stop.

Lack of patience is the enemy of this exercise, as it is in your life in general. The ability to control your thoughts requires practice and patience, but as long as you are working toward this goal, patience shouldn't be an issue.

You will be able to better control your thoughts if you practice with a goal in mind and keep practicing. As a result, your anxiety and stress will decrease, and you will have a greater chance of realizing your dreams.